Showing posts with label Review. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Review. Show all posts

Wednesday 7 February 2024

Vallejo Shifters - It's all Dust Baby!

In 2023 I managed to snag an absolute bargain of an eBay joblot. I got a metric ton of airbrush paints including this trio of Vallejo Shifters sets.

I've used them on a few models so far but my main gripe is that the supplied swatches don't at all marry up to my experience.  I decided to make my own swatches and to test if it using a gloss black undercoat made any difference to the effect. 

Before anyone shouts "You should have used spoons!", I probably should but my main objective was to have something I could tuck into the box as a handy reference and not have to dig out my cutlery drawer.  Some of these paints don't look anything like what is in the bottle and their names are no help either.

Galaxy Dust

Vallejo Shifters - Galaxy Dust Colour Shifting Acrylic Paint Set

  • 77.002 Light Violet Green - A minty coldish green which flips to a greyish purple at about 20 degrees.

  • 77.008 Green Gold Cold Blue - A nice verdant green which flips to a dark blue.

  • 77.009 Turquoise Violet - A really nice 70s blue flake flipping to a solid purple with flecks of irridescent blue. This is the standout colour of the set.

  • 77.010 Emerald Green Mauve - a darker more blueish green flipping to purple.

  • 77.017 Green Silver Blue -almost identical to 002 but a bit more opaque to begin with before flipping to a much greyer colour.

  • 77.018 Dark Green Tin -a really nice warm green which flips toward yellow.

Magic Dust

Vallejo Shifters Magic Dust Colour Shifting Acrylic Paint Set
  • 77.001 Violet Old Copper - nah, this is definitely a purple to blue shift and it's really quite good doing multiple flips the further away from 0 degrees you get.  Nice.

  • 77.006 Gold Pale Blue - this was way too subtle for me.  It's a greeny gold to begin with and it pretty much stays there.

  • 77.007 Pearl Violet - Purple to a dark grey.

  • 77.011 Old Silver Pale Violet - Another super subtle shift which just goes black to my eyes.  I will chalk this up to a faile in application even though this was the most successful swatch of the three.

  • 77.012 Silver Pink - Is it? just looks Greeney Purple to me.

  • 77.015 Gold Yellow Burnt Orange - Green to a very nice Gold.  Just pipped into second place by 001.  I used this on the cockpit glass of my Swordfish II model and it looks great even if it has a propensity for spiderwebbing.

Space Dust

Vallejo Shifters Space Dust Colour Shifting Acrylic Paint Set

  • 77.003 Orange Violet - This is the colour I chose to use on B'lakor's wings and over a curved surface it works quite well.  However, this doesn't cover great and will need multiple coats to get a really pronounced effect.

  • 77.004 Electric Blue Intense Violet - Blue to a sort of purple, just not as successful as 001.

  • 77.005 Green Blue Velvet - I think I might have messed this one up, I'm not getting an effect at all but it is a really nice metallic green.

  • 77.013 Bright Gold Brown - Very subtle but a transition from green to an orangey brown is there.  Perhaps on a larger curved surface this will work quite well

  • 77.014 Old Gold Grey Violet -  I'm just not getting the gold here.  It's another green to purple transition.

  • 77.016 Red Gold - this is definitely a green to gold transition but it is green for a long time..

To Gloss or Not to Gloss, That is THE Question. 

I have to say I can't see any difference myself.  However, airbrushing the paint onto a gloss surface made a huge difference when you are actually spraying.  The gloss is a barrier and makes the paint much more likely to pool or to spiderweb.  There is a lot of acrylic medium in the mix which is what suspends the metallic particles, but this takes an age to dry and if you are like me patience is something I have yet to learn...

Overall Opinion

There are a lot of colours which basically look green.  I imagine that there is some perfectly reasonable physics paper which explains how the light refraction effect works.  I will continue to use them and these swatches are going to help a lot in the choices I make.  However, it really does depend on the miniature you are painting and the exact curves on the model to achieve the best results.  

All the Vallejo Shifter Colour Swatches

Space marines or any character wearing pauldrons or other similarly curved armour pieces is going to look great using shifters.  Large Armoured Fighting Vehicles (AFVs) with flat panels I'm guessing less so, but I am intrigued to see what it looks like on a windscreen of a car.

Saturday 3 February 2024

Scavengers Reign - An Exploration of Xenomorphology

I saw this trailed last year and, as a big fan of the art of the great french comic book illustrator Moebius aka Jean Giraud, I was gobsmacked with how similar in style it looked to many of his amazing strips.

It immediately brought back memories of watching Les MaĆ®tres du temps (The Masters of Time) and I knew I would have to give it a watch.

Scavengers Reign - Azi & Levi

More than just a Robinson Crusoe Rehash

The story revolves around the lives of three groups of survivors who landed their escape pods on a lush and verdant planet in very different circumstances.  Many of their shipmates have not been so lucky and did not survive to reach the surface, although it is not long before you start to realise that maybe its the dead who are lucky.

The 12 episodes are a busmans guide on how to create a planet full of interesting and diverse flaura and fauna which spends all of its time trying to eat you.  Wrapped around this core survival trope are evolving backstories which explore why each of the very differnt characters chose to thrust themselves out into the great void.

Beautifully animated and biologically complex, the writers have crafted a world which has so much natural diversity and complexity in their life cycles and symbiotic relationships with each other.  This goes well beyond the simple and makes Gieger's Xenomorph look like a children's story book.  

In the same way, the individual backstories of each character are explored in detail from the venal and pathetic Kamen to the strange relationship between Azi and her robot companion Levi.  These are as complex and interesting as their surroundings.  However, sometimes I feel this is designed to lull you into a false sense of security.  Needless to say in these more tender moments their next brush with the disaster is only around the corner.

Traveller Eat Your Heart Out.

This is exactly how I remember early Traveller scenarios going back in the day.  Every scenario was an exercise in exploration and discovering new and deadly lifeforms.  I remember playing those classic double adventures like Shadows or the Chamax Plague and loving them.   


Justifiers - Out of The Mists
Traveller - Shadows

It also brought back memories of running my favourite long dead sci-fi exploration RPG Justifiers.  With only a little modification each of these episodes would make for an entertaining set of encounters for any party.

Is Scavengers Reign Worth Watching?

If you enjoy carefully crafted and beautiful landscapes filled with interesting biology then yes, absolutely.  If you want fast paced action then this is not the animation for you.  If you can imagine watching a 6 hour long Studio Ghibli masterpiece where your own mortality is repeatedly rammed down your throat in the most violent but interesting ways.  Only then are you getting somewhere close to the gorgeous grotesqueness of this show. 

It is rare for a show like this to ever get greenlit or make it past a 30 minute long short so we have to reward the creative geniuses behind the scenes and watch their show.

Saturday 4 June 2022

Obi What a Disaster!

I confess I am not a fan of Disney Star Wars.  It has been a car crash right from the first sequel movie (with the exception of the Mandalorian and the Book of Boba Fett) and the latest installment continues that fine tradition.

What The Actual Fuck! 

I'm just a jobbing DM okay, but I understand continuity and if you are going to write a story in a well established universe then there are some rules you have to follow or you are going to fuck it up.

1. Don't rewrite canon!

Established events are exactly that ESTABLISHED.  If it happened in a previous story then it must happen again.  If a character says something which ordains a historic set of actions then any prequel story you write must maintain those actions or events.

For example when Leia contacts Obi Wan Kenobi she refers to him as a Jedi who fought alongside my father in the clone wars.  This intimates that she has never met him herself and has only heard about him through the war stories her father told her.  So don't set up a 6 part prequel TV series with the singular premise of finding and rescuing the kidnapped 10 year version of Leia.

Young Leia Organa
Don't worry farm boy, I got this

Another example would be the meeting of Kenobi and Vader aboard the Death Star in A New Hope when Vader tells him that the last time they met he was but the learner and now he is the master.  This clearly refers to their last encounter on Mustafa when Anakin was Kenobi's padawan.  Don't set up a showdown that breaks the canon and can only end in a standoff because you can't kill either of the main characters.

2. Be consistent with your characters!

The mark of an incompetent writer is to set up an event and then to back out of it when they realise that they have written themselves into a plot cul de sac.  They usually hit reverse with some mcguffin of an idea which further compounds their error and highlights their incompetence.

For example in the quarry standoff between Kenobi and Vader the Dark Lord of the Sith uses his considerable power to drag Kenobi around like a ragdoll and put out flames with a wave of his hand.  But when the writer has realised that Kenobi is going to die (which can't happen right) he is suddenly defeated by flames and cannot force grab the droid rescuing Kenobi.  Pathetic writing which isn't even consistent with the events of a few seconds ago.  

Darth Vader defeated by flames
Can someone call the firebrigade?

A lesser event but no less irritating occurs when the stormtrooper tells Kenobi to tell them his "long story" as it's a long ride and then no more than three minutes later that's it the stormtroopers are at their destination.  Let's be honest, It wasn't a long story and the stormtroopers were a few miles at best away from their destination.  For God's sake was this written by a 10 year old. 

If you are going to make Obi-Wan a shadow of his former self then at least stay consistent.  When he is confronted by the stormtroopers at the laser gate (oh God, the laser gate...) he instantly turns into John Wick and laser blasts them in seconds despite having a known hatred for "uncivilised" blasters.

Kenobi Wick
You killed my dog mother funsta!!

3. Things don't happen instantly

We know that time is a tricksy thing.  You have to allow a certain amount of time to elapse between establishing a thing and then that thing having a consequence.  Travel between worlds takes time even using hyperspace.  You can't just despatch probe droids one minute and them turn up conveniently in the next scene at exactly the right place.  That my dear writer is a mcguffin.

This was an entirely unnecessary element which only served as the backdrop to a power struggle between the two inquisitors.  Do the garrison on Daiyu not have communication with Inquisitor HQ?  Does the notion of sending a photo not occur to them?

Oh my the force is weak with this one. 

Saturday 18 December 2021

Buckaroo Banzai - Probably the Greatest Cult Movie in the World

I get a lot of flack from my friends at Dragonskeep Roleplay Club about my tastes in movies.  I'm accused of liking a lot of garbage, but in my defence I watch a lot of films.  The good, the bad, the ugly, the popular, the art house, the esoteric, I will give any movie a go and, as my step daughter will attest, I even cried during the end of Hannah Montanna!

The reason I watch so many films is simply to expose myself to story ideas.  As a Games Master, I rework, hack, borrow, pay homage and down right steal these ideas and use them in my own games.  In fact borrowing these story elements is an essential skills when creating your own stories for Tabletop RPG Games.  

Buckaroo Banzai

What's New Buckaroo?

Buckaroo Banzai or to use its full title The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension (1984) is a low budget sci-fi written by Earl Mac Rauch and directed by W.D. Richter (Invasion of the Body Snatchers, Big Trouble in Little China, Brubaker).

The movie follows one adventure of polymath Buckaroo Banzai (Peter Weller) who is a skilled neurosurgeon, rock musician, crime fighter and test pilot as he uncovers an insidious alien invasion by the Red Lectroids from Planet 10.

Buckaroo is ably assisted by his team of crimefighters / band mates, the Hong Kong Cavaliers and by a secret network of civillian volunteers known as the Blue Blaze Irregulars.  Buckaroos connections within the Government run deep and is often called on by the president to resolve issues in times of National Emergency.

Wow that's a Lot of Ideas

Absolutely and it only gets worse.  Buckaroo Banzai is like an onion being peeled, each layer reveals another underneath.  It's a classic story of boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy saves world from an alien invasion and finally gets the girl wrapped in a shell of barely explained world building which creates tantalising visions of a fully developed and lived in universe.  A classic example is the famous waternelon scene, but I'll tell you later about that one.  

My own particular favourite is the idea that the famous radio broadcast of War of the worlds on October 30th 1938 was in fact an eyewitness account of the Lectroid invasion.  I also love the idea that there is an entire secret network of Buckaroo fans out there who are willing to lend a hand at the drop of a hat is a really useful concept for any GM out there thinking about doing some world building.

Rick and Morty takes the idea of the polymath to the extreme, but I love the Secretary of Defense (Matt Taylor) who is a slimy politician that knows he is completely out of his depth by comparison.  Buckaroo is a loyal subject and gives the government his expertise because he loves his country and wants to help.  Rick on the other hand is contemptuous of everyone.      

Before they Were Famous

I've mentioned our titular hero, but the film has a stellar cast of actors many of whom have gone on to become huge hollywood stars and household names.  Just look at this cavalcade of talent:

  • Peter Weller as Buckaroo Banzai
  • John Lithgow as Emilio Lizardo / Lord John Whorfin
  • Jeff Goldblum as New Jersey
  • Christopher Lloyd as John BigbootĆ©
  • Ellen Barkin as Penny Priddy (Pretty Penny get it)
  • Clancy Brown as Rawhide
  • Vincent Schiavelli as John O'Connor

They Don't Make Them Like This Anymore

Well this isn't strictly true, the Hollywood studio system has emasculated the auteur director and subjected movies to an endless hell of screenings and audience ratings.  There are a handful of directors who have enough weight to just do their own thing but they are thin on the ground.

My search for those stories which don't get told and don't get the big studio budget is how I get tarred with the bad movie taste brush.  If you want to be wowed by big special effects then go see a Michael Bay movie, but if you want to see a story that you've not seen before then you need to look past the explosions and the flimsy walls and open your mind.

Tuesday 23 March 2021

Cosmic Sin or Cinematic Crime?

Cosmic Sin is a new straight to streaming release starring Frank Grillo & Bruce Willis written and Directed by Francis Drake (Breach, Broil).

Low budget does not automatically mean bad

Cosmic Sin
A Cosmic Mistake
If I only watched big budget blockbuster movies I would miss out on those true gems which defy the odds and punch like a champion.  Films like the The Brass Teapot, or my all time favourite The Adventures of  Buckaroo Banzai Across The 8th Dimension would never have seen the sparring ring never mind being on the title card.

Sadly this movie is not a contender.  It begins as a zombie movie before turning into a sci-fi shooter and really doesn't know what it wants to be.  Is it a straight up guns blazing action movie or is it a polemic on the nature of war and genocide of hostile alien species?  Are humans the bad guys here or were the aliens irredeemable?

It doesn't matter because it never holds onto its train of thought long enough until it's onto the next scene.  Pacing is in fact diabloical.

One huge complaint that I have is the dialogue for CJ Perry's character.  I think she had some great punch lines, like a sassy Vasquez, but the audio was terrible when she delivered them and I'll never get the joke. 

High Points?  

It's not all bad and there are some moments where the movie shines.  The suits look fantastic and the nig bad alien costumes are pretty good.  This is a Saban production so you get Power Rangers quality costumery.  Stalwart TV actor Costas Mandylor uses his screen time to great effect making everyone look wooden by comparison.  


However, it's not enough to save this movie especially when it gets to the final act where it completely loses the plot quite literally.  It's almost like the final quarter of the movie is from an entirely different movie.

It's not like I didn't give it a fair shake of the stick.

I watched it twice so that you don't have to...

Thursday 25 February 2021

Netflix Binge - Tribes of Europa

Every now and then Netflix has a bit of a stonker on its hands and Tribes of Europa feels like it's going to be another one.

Pitched Like a Young Adult Novel

Tribes of Europa
Tribes of Europa
art reminds me of 80s Chocky

I was a little wary going into this series as I knew absolutely nothing about it except for the teaser photo and the trailer.  It came across as another Hunger Games / Scorch Trials style post apocalyptic YA novel.  I've been burned before with the sanctimonius "Kids save the future" mantra but I'm a glutton for punishment and so I fired up the Netflix and gave it a go.

Older Cast Members Show the Kids How It's Done

Whilst the 3 main protagonists we follow through the series are all young performers in their teens or early twenties, the cast is made up of some heavyweight older actors who put meat on this stories bones.  I dont want to sound dismissive about their acting talents, they do a reasonable job, but they pale before their much more experienced co-stars. 

Perhaps that is exactly the point.  Liv (Henrietta Confurius), Kiano (Emilio Sakraya) and Elia (David Ali Rashed) are supposed to have led a sheltered life as forest dwelling Origine, protected by the forest and their elders non-confrontational philosophy.  

When they are exposed to the other tribes and the world outside their tiny microcosm their naivete, like their acting, is laid bare.  

The standouts for me are Moses (Oliver Masucci) sporting a moustache that would make Nikola Tesla proud.  A grifter and con man who befriends Elia (pr. El-e-ya), he is a pre-collapse survivor and a necessary tool of exposition filling in the blanks about how the world got to where it is. 

Sebastian Blomberg steals every scene as the menacing Kapitan Yvar of the Crow gang.  He looks like he has just stepped off stage supporting Danzig or The Sisters of Mercy (Flood period).  Cutting an imposing figure he rules a post apocalypse Berlin with a studded leather fist and demands undying loyalty from his subjects or, you guessed it, you die horribly.

Mekika Faroutan (Lord Varvara) oozes seduction and machiavellian schemery with every graceful step.  She craves power and position among the elite Crow but you get the distinct impression that Yvar knows that she is a threat and keeps her subdued with promises of elevation dangled in front of her like a ball of string to a cat.

Tonal Shift and Adult Themes

The opening episode reminded me of classic 80s TV Scifi shows like Chocky (1984), The Tomorrow People (1973) and The Tripods (1984) 

As the series progresses we are gradually introduced to the other tribes and the tone shifts to something much darker.  Some of the scenes are distinctly adult in nature and the series carries a 15 rating for a good reason.  I guess that the TV landscape has changed since Game of Thrones.  Now every show has to have its fair share of bloody gore and nudity. There is also a strong drug reference with the Crows being fueled on some strange inhaled narcotic much like the war boys from Mad Max: Fury Road.

This makes for engaging adult viewing and to be honest is a refreshing change from the usual Young Adult glittery vampire or schoolboy scorceror nonsense that we had to put up with in the noughties.  I for one think that you should let Young Adults watch things which challenge them rather than shield them from adult themes and concepts. 

To the writing crews credit, they've managed to make a believeable world in just six episode short series and I now now eagerly anticipate a second.

Tuesday 5 January 2021

The Vast of Night - A Spooky Tale in 50s America

With a dearth of hollywood movies being made in 2020 thanks to COVID-19, the discerning sci-fi fan has had to look high and low on the streaming services to satisfy their need for entertainment.

One such lockdown sleeper I discovered was The Vast of Night (2019) available to rent on Amazon. 

 

Everett and Fay listen to the mysterious story of former soldier Bill

Through the premise of a "Twilight Zone" style television the viewer is transported to the rural New Mexico town of Cayuga in the late 1950s.  Using fly-on-the wall cinematography we follow our protagonists Everet Sloan (Jake Horowitz), a local radio DJ, and high schoolgirl Fay Crocker (Sierra McCormick) as they move around town trying to piece together the story of mysterious and spooky goings on.

The Midnight Hour DJ style of this tale reminds me very much of the excellent animation The Kirlian Frequencies (2017) and of course the classic Kolchak: The Nightstalker (1972)

Much of the detail of the story is delivered through intense monologue where your attention hangs on every word and sound.  The acting is top notch from the entire cast and you are immediately engaged with their story.  Pacing is excellent with just enough "action" to give you that sense of urgency and panic that there is genuine fear going through their minds.

All in all a fantastic little low budget movie with a well handled finale which some Hollywood directors could learn from. 

Tuesday 9 June 2020

Arena - Futuristic Boxing in Space

Browsing through YouTube can be a dangerous game, particularly when you find a trove of old Sci-Fi and Fantasy B Movies

Arena (1989)

Arena (1989) VHS Cover
I distinctly remember the cover of this B-movie budget space Rocky calling to me from the shelves of Blockbuster video back in the day.  It wasn't a contender for my attention then, but in the middle of the COVID-19 lockdown, frankly I can't think of any good excuse to not watch it.

The story is a simple one our hero Steve Armstrong, (Paul Satterfield) is a young kid with a talent for boxing had dreams of becoming a professional fighter and bought a one way ticket to starstation the home of the biggest fights in the Galaxy, The Arena.  A year later his dream is shattered and he spends his days as a short order cook in a fast food joint run by his boss the four armed alien Shorty (Hamilton Camp).

A chance brawl with a customer turns into a job offer from promoter Quinn (Claudia Christian) and a trial in the Arena.  However, Steve is the only human in 50 years to fight in the Arena against aliens and he is hopelessly outmatched.  Can he face impossible odds and become a contender?

Aliens, so many Aliens

The budget on this movie was pretty slim but they spent it wisely on a cavalcade of monster makeup.  It makes the cantena scene in Star Wars look like 2 men and a dog.  There is so much variety it really makes you feel like the Galaxy is teeming with alien species of all shapes and sizes.

The downside of this is of course that they spent all the money on monster makeup and next to nothing on writers, special effects, models etc.  The list goes on. 

The Director in me says "what the hell if I'm making Rocky in Space how much script do I need and this is pretty much what director Peter Manoogian must have though too.  He does his best and to be honest there are some great moments, in particular when they do an inventive visual gag based on Shorty's four arms.

Claudia Christian (Ivanova in Bablylon 5) is her usual classy self and Armin Shimerman (Quark in DS9) also does a respectable turn as the henchman Weezil who is aided in his master plan by the duplicitous alien cyborg skull (William Butler).  It's worth sticking this one out to see what happens to this guy.

It was Acceptable in the 80s

To be honest this wasn't as bad as the terrible video cover art had me believe.  The only truly excrutiating part was having to listen to the truly awful songs of futuristic cabaret star Jade (Shari Shattuck).  It's a relatively engaging story if a little cliched as we follow Steve's career reach its climax with the big fight against six time champion Horn (Michael Deak), a drug fuelled half robot half horned devil beast.

Give it a go, there are honestly worse things you can with 90 minutes of your life.

Tuesday 2 June 2020

Schwarzenegger and Chan Team up in Weird Wuxia Fantasy

The Mystery of the Dragon Seal (also known as The Iron Mask) is the sequel to 2014's utterly bonkers Forbidden Empire
The Mystery of the Dragon Seal
Watch it on
Amazon Prime

Directed by Oleg Stepchenko this is a bizarre mix of Russian creativity and Chinese money which results in a visually sumptuous affair.  Immaculatly dressed sets, fantastic wire work and a half decent storyline make this an engaging watch.

Set in the mid 1700s, Jason Flemyng reprises his role as hapless cartographer and adventurer Jonathan Green who, having survived the supernatural monsters of Transylvannia, has made it to the court of Peter the First of Russia.  Having previously met the Tsar when he visited London, Green is eager to present the map he has made for the him and hopefully be richly rewarded for his efforts. 

However, Green immediately spots that an imposter sits on the throne of Russia and he is summarily thrown in jail where he meets the Cheng Lan, daughter of kung fu master Jackie Chan.

Pigeon post correspondence with his betrothed Miss Dudley is intercepted by the real Tsar who is currently imprisoned in the Tower of London alongside Jackie Chan.  They return a pigeon and the whole story starts to pick up pace thanks to some political influence from her father (Charles Dance).

Enter unlikely prison warden and history buff James Hook (Captain Hook?) played by Arnold Schwarzenegger.  He seems to spend a lot of his screen time in a weird Ultimate Fighting American Ninja Death Match ring where prisoners have to beat him in combat and climb to the top of a ladder to win their freedom.

I don't want to spoil it for you so I will leave the spoilers there.  I will say one last thing though, Rutger Haur has a fleeting cameo.

What Did I think?

I have never been a fan of movies where you can literally feel the influence of the producers.  Arnie was an executive producer and it feels like his segments are overly long and drawn out because he is in control.  There is a nagging sense of direction by committee about this movie.

The multi-national cast means that the movie is dubbed entirely in English and badly at times even when the English cast are talking you can see that sections have been redubbed to change dialogue.  I'm guessing that the intention from the getgo is to sell this movie to as many different territories as possible with their own local dubbed version so lipsync is going to be an issue no matter who watches it.  Welcome to the real world of modern global cinema.  

Whilst this is immensely fun and a much better than the original movie in colour palette consistency and delivery it is no wuxia masterpiece like Detective Dee and the Mystery of the Phantom Flame.

An enjoyable watch if you don't think too hard.

Monday 19 January 2015

Rich Dad, Poor Dad and the un-game of Cashflow

A close friend of mine and long time gamer has embarked on a new career as a property developer and has become a fan of the work of business guru Robert Kiyosaki author of the well known book Rich Dad Poor Dad.

Diversification and Passive Income are the mantra of many of these self help millionaires and Kiyosaki has branched out into the realm of games design.  Yes, you heard right.  He's a Games Designer, that's his BGG entry for the boardgame Cashflow, he designed back in 1996.

Now doesn't that look exciting


Recently I was invited to play this little gem of a game and boy does it suck!! 

It's a game of two halves, but both are roll and move.  In part one you travel around the center circle trying to avoid the here you travel around a very small 25 space center board landing on various "investment opportunities" either stocks and shares or property which you can purchase with your savings.  You also have the chance of landing on one of the "bad" spaces which may result in you losing your job and missing a couple of turns, having a baby (aka a joyous bundle of unplanned overhead) or landing on a luxury space and having to buy a suit or repair your car.  These "bad" spaces are so few and far between that they have little impact on the outcome of the game in fact the distribution is arranged in such a way that it is a statistical impossibility.

Once you've amassed a passive income which equals your salary you have essentially "left the rat race" and can now move on to stage two.  In which you basically do exactly the same but instead buy established businesses with even less chance of risk.  There's so little risk or consequence to the game and your decisions have so little effect that a game of snakes and ladders looks appealing by comparison.

There's a mild form of game balancing via the drawing of "career cards" which control what your starting cashflow stats are, but there's no game here.  No deep decision making, no evaluation of risk (it's all laid out on each card in bold text), no balancing of resources, nothing.  I'm speculating but I think that there's an educational reason for this, Kiyosaki wants to teach you that becoming a self sufficient is easy and in the game of cashflow it is in fact there's no way to lose.  I think he needs to listen to the wise words of real plutocrat Nick Hanauer.

A quick google reveals that the game retails for in excess of £100 shipped to the UK, so I guess the secret of cashflow is to author an incredibly lame game and charge the absolutely earth for it.  Apparently there are cashflow clubs where this pile of shite is played on a regular basis, probably because they're too ashamed to play it outside of those select gatherings. 

Someone needs to give them a copy of Monopoly or The Game of Life it will blow their freaking minds.

Thursday 5 December 2013

Space Hulk on iOS - A first impressions video review

David Neumann's iOS News Blog on Boardgame Geek is a must read if you're an iPad owning boardgamer and I was over the moon when I read that Games Workshop had signed a deal with Full Control to develop an iOS version of Space Hulk.

12 months later...

It's finally here.


Available to download from the iTunes App Store

Sunday 9 June 2013

Cleopatra and The Society of Architects

I've been trying to get a copy of this sadly out of print game for a few years now and thanks to eBay managed to bag an un-punched German language copy last week.

Cleopatra and the Society of Architects
Published in 2006, by Days of Wonder, design by Bruno Cathala (Shadows over Camelot) and Ludovic Maublanc (Cash 'n' Guns), Cleopatra and the Society of Architects is a sumptuous 3 to 5 player game with an Egyptian theme.  Each player is an architect trying to impress Queen Cleopatra (and guarantee a prosperous afterlife) by constructing architectural features for her new palace project.  These adornments are represented by gorgeous plastic miniatures in the shape of 6 Sphinx, 2 Obelisks, 9 Column sections, 2 Door frames and Cleopatra's Throne and pedestal.

The Completed Palace
Ingeniously, the game utilises the box lid as a 3D game board onto which you lay the tessellating Mosaics of The Gods, Cleopatra's Throne and its Pedestal.  Columns and Door frames are placed around the sides of the box and interact with each other to score even more cash when built.  This gives the whole game a wonderful 3 dimensional feel which adds to its appeal and to be honest Days of Wonder could have made this game using traditional card components but it just wouldn't have had the visual impact (but would not have deserved the £40 price tag) or the tactile element which is so fun.

The game itself has a simple concept, collect resources from the market and build various items to decorate Cleopatra's new Palace.  Each time you build you earn money and the object of the game is be the richest surviving architect.

A smorgasbord of components
Yes, I did say "Surviving", because along the way you will inevitably acquire corruption amulets for having to use "tainted" resources, not offering enough cash to the high priest or simply trying to do dodgy deals with various "Worshippers of Sobek".  These corruption amulets get counted up in the end game and the most corrupt architect is fed to Cleopatra's crocodile.

There's a ton of different mechanics in the game from area control to trick taking and even a blind auction so there's plenty of opportunity for you to different strategies to try to win.  The multiple mechanics for gaining and removing corruption tokens means that you never really know who is in the lead at any time making for a tense and fun end game.  This is always something high on my priority list when I look at a new game.

As I said before my copy is German, and I foolishly thought that I could get away this as the majority of the cards just have the German names for Wood, Stone, Marble and Craftsmen.  However, the "Worshippers of Sobek" (aka the tainted character cards) had other ideas.  These cards have complex instructions on their use which needs to be readily available to the players.  My solution was to photoshop the German Summary Cards and replace the text with English, no mean feat I can tell you.  If anyone has scans of the English summary cards to donate, I would be most grateful.

Playing the game with 4 players

Sunday 4 September 2011

MOVIEWATCH: Attack The Block (15)

Having been a fan of the cult humour of Adam & Joe for many years, the bar of expectation (good name for a wondrous item, that) was set pretty high for Joe Cornish's directorial debut.  

I can happily report that Attack the Block is definitely well worth seeing and I'd go so far as to give it 4 out of 5 stars.


The action takes place in and around a South East London council estate, where a gang of youths led by Moses attempt to thwart an alien invasion.  The film hangs on the premise that Good can indeed come from Evil when the circumstances dictate it, and the quasi-redemption of Moses (John Boyega) and the rest of his gang is both darkly humorous and thought provoking to watch in light of the recent rioting in London and other parts of the UK.

Cornish's comedic sensibilities shine through and create some genuinely funny moments as counterpoints to the movie's tense and scary undertone.  The creature design is innovative and well executed applying the common sense approach of less is most definitely more when working on a modest budget (for a sci-fi film) of $13 Million.  The decision to cast newcomers to play the youths keeps the authenticity level high, whilst the inclusion of established actors in the shape of Nick Frost (Ron), Jodie Whitaker (Sam) and Luke Treadaway (Brewis) keeps the film accessible.

The only issue I have with the film is that the language used will not be familiar to most, being very specific to South East London gang culture of 2011 and like all similar "gang" films the colloquialisms will be also date very quickly.  To help out here are a few words translated into English.

Endz - Gang territory, the estate.  Originating from the concept that gangs territory is defined from one end of a road to the other.
Bare - Good
Fam - Family or gang.  Abbreviation of Family.
D'ya'getme - Do you understand me.
Snitch - Informer, also used to
Po Po / Feds - Police
Bra Bra Bra - The sound of a machine pistol being fired.

There's some pretty rich material in here for any DM thinking of running an alien invasion one nighter and the setting would quite easily transpose onto any metropolis be it Chicago's Projects, Paris's "Banlieue, Rio's "Favela" or the city-bottom Blocks of Mega City One  

Monday 25 July 2011

Movie Watch: Eyeborgs

Adrian Paul (Highlander TV Series) and Danny Trejo (Machete) star in this cautionary tale of technology gone too far set in a near future Chicago.  

The eyeborgs of the title are mobile surveillance cameras tasked with the surveillance of society for the Department of Homeland Security, but have they been compromised and if so, by whom?  Gunner Reynolds (Adrian Paul) a DHS agent discovers the truth about the real nature of the eyeborgs design.



If you can get past the distinctly "TV Movie" CGI eyeborgs which are nicely modeled but poorly composited, there's a good plot in there and certainly something that hasn't been seen before. The characters, and perhaps Paul's acting, are a little one dimensional but passable and Danny Trejo has the most lines I've ever heard him speak in one movie.

A solid 4 out of 5 for the story and a 3 out of 5 for the CGI.

Tuesday 24 May 2011

MOVIEWATCH: Limitless (15)

Little clip here from the movie Limitless starring Bradley Cooper (of The Hangover and The A-Team fame) which somehow managed to slip under the radar here at Rolplay-Geek HQ...



++REVIEW++

Watching this movie was as much a revelation, for me, in how you make a superb superhero movie as was, Akira to animation or Blade Runner to near future Sci-Fi.

If you haven't seen this movie, put it at the top of your list (or at least above Green Lantern) you will not be dissapointed.  Unfortunately I can't tell you anything about the plot in the sameway as you don't talk about Fight Club... it spoils the punchline.

Bob DeNiro is of course playing Bob DeNiro again, but there are shades of Travis Bickle in there which overshadow even Bradley Cooper's utterly believable performance as Eddie Morra, both as struggling writer and limitless hero.

5 STARS!!